She's gone from suck... to blow!

ROBOSUCK: Okay, so I return home one day on a break from school to find an oversized white plastic frisbee scooting around our living room floor making a whirring noise, mindin its own business. Behind it trailed our family dog, who was tensely stalking it and occasionally growling in disapproval. After watching this (admittedly unexpected) spectacle for a few minutes, I learn that my parents had purchased a Roomba.

This thing is simply cool. You push a button on it, and an hour later, your carpet is clean. It beeps like a happy Japanese Pokemon Toy, even though it's designed here in the Ass-Kicking US. It moves deliberately. You can tell it's thinking. It gets out of the way of furniture, remembers where its been, and it even hits the brakes if it thinks it's going off the stairs. Oh, dod I mention that it's loads of fun to watch? Needless to say, we initially spent more time watching this thing vaccuum than it would have taken to do it by hand, and the carpet is cleaner than it's ever been. ("Oh, hello Neighbor X, did you see our vaccuum yet?" Rinse, repeat.)

The icing on the cake is the remote that comes with it. You can drive it around like a little vaccuum-enabled remote control car. If only it went faster...

I am definitely buying one when I get an apartment. And some money.

JOTD (Joke of the Day): Did you hear about the dyslexic pimp who bought a warehouse?

(I'm going to be screwed if I end up meeting someone who's read this blog already... I'm not going to have any jokes to tell)
Coming soon: I'm working on my broken back story, which will probably be long enough to warrant its own page.